Self-Defense Failure Zone – Rory Miller (Conflict Manager – MAY, 2016)

  Rory Writes: This was just going to be an example for the last article on reframing, but it grew into an article of it’s own. One aspect of self-defense that is rarely addressed are low level predators and creeping victimizations. The low-level predators are the ones who keep their victims uncomfortable, but never cross … [Read more…]

Seven Primary Ways of Conflict Management, Part II – Erik Kondo

There are seven primary ways of Conflict Management. They are Change Others, By-Proxy, Avoidance, Negotiation, Deterrence, By-Force, and Mitigation. There are seven primary ways of Conflict Mis-management. They are Change Others, By-Proxy, Avoidance, Negotiation, Deterrence, By-Force, and Mitigation. Yes, the methods of conflict management can also be the methods of conflict mis-management and vice-versa. What works in one … [Read more…]

Circle Straddlers (dealing with subtle unacceptable behavior) – Marc MacYoung

There is a behavior I call “circle straddling’ (although as you’ll see, “line waddling” works too.) Think of a circle of socially acceptable behaviors. Inside that circle social convention keeps you safe. For example, if you don’t say certain things (follow social ‘rules’), you won’t get hit, stabbed or shot (more social rules). Here’s a … [Read more…]

The Seven Primary Ways of Conflict Management – Erik Kondo

Human life has been and always will be filled interpersonal conflict. These conflicts range from mild disagreements to murder. Conflicts are the natural result of people have opposing interests. When it comes to handling interpersonal conflict, everyone has a “way” (strategy/methodology) of dealing with it. In fact, everyone has their own unique way. These many … [Read more…]

The 12 Universal Elements of Conflict Management – Erik Kondo

The following is a selected post from Conflict Manager Magazine. Full access to this monthly magazine is available to subscribers only. Click here to subscribe. Interesting in submitting an article for publication? Email:  “A smooth sea never made a skilled sailor” – English Proverb It is likely that there will come a time when … [Read more…]

Optimize Your Life: Conflict Manager vs. Conflict Mis-manager – Erik Kondo

op•ti•mize verb 1. make the best or most effective use of (a situation, opportunity, or resource). “to optimize viewing conditions, the microscope should be correctly adjusted”   Your life is a limited resource and you want to use it as effectively as possible. You may choose to use your life in a wide variety of … [Read more…]

13 Reasons Why “I” Don’t Need Conflict Management Skills – Erik Kondo

I have a “right” to be treated with respect, it is other people’s responsibility to treat me respectfully regardless of my behavior. I shouldn’t have to be concerned with my own personal safety, my safety should other people’s responsibility. I am a business owner, all my employees treat each other politely and fairly at all … [Read more…]